the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
