He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
