Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
