that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
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