we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
