You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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