did you get engaged???
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize
