Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Come see our sink grown plant.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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