I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Randomize
