it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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