I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
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