ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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