So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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