it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Screwed.edu
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
