called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Randomize