So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
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