I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
