So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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