i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
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