My Higher Power is John Stamos
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
