You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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