I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
