I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
