we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Randomize