So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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