I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
