I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
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