I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Panties = found
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
