I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
