Porn is love you can see.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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