Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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