but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
