doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
