don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Randomize
