just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Randomize
