so that wasnt chicken after all
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
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