Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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