Grow some girl-balls and come out already
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
