What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
