seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
