Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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