As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
