My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
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