ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
