So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
