Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Randomize