we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Just invented taco cereal.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
