I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
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