I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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