covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
