his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I will be naked everywhere
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize