so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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