i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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