I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
i've created a new STD.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
